daines'n around

It is one of those decisions that you never feel completely cure that it is the best one to make. Where, when and how should I begin my career after college?

Do I go after unpaid internships and hope that they land me a better-paying job? Do I stay in the town I was educated in thus maintaining my circle of friends and my professional contacts? Do I leave and start all over again?

In what seems to be a family tradition I will be moving soon. I've shared the past three years with my two cats, my father and (for two of those years) my sister. It is going to be difficult to make the change again.

I've had five interviews in the past three weeks, and most of this last week has been waiting for a response. I haven't left the house much at all, in fear that I might miss that important phone call of an unexpected job offer allowing me to retain most of my comfortable friends and familiar environments in Southern California.

My dad looked at me this afternoon as I paced around the house waiting for phone calls, and stroked my unshaven face. It'd been more than 6 days since I had last shaved and I think I wore my blue 'rock music' t-shirt three out of four days this weekend. Time is in some sort of vacuumed warp around me. But as my dad washed the dishes he looked at me and said, "I would have thought you would have enjoyed the down time and not having to work for a while."

I laughed. I like to be busy, with something... even if it is sleepless blog redesign and finally writing something down.

Luckily the world cup has kept me riveted most mornings when I wake up early enough. Until the beginning of this week, it was the only thing I knew with a certainty would take place, and I could count on it to lull me back to sleep or keep me awake.

I couldn't sleep tonight. I've accepted a position out of state. I begin work in Utah July 10. I keep hesitating to say anything to anyone because it is still up in the air. I'm waiting for two other job possibilities to get back to me. I was so sure that they won't be able to beat Utah's wages for the entry-level media position so I felt comfortable in accepting the job.

I have much more to think about. Enjoy the redesign.